When you have a thorn in your finger you have a couple of choices. You can either take that thorn out immediately to ease the pain or you can choose to leave it in there and suffer. Sounds like a simple choice, right? Now let’s apply that same concept to a person or a situation that causes you pain—why does the choice become more difficult? Is there an emotional attachment? Do you have a sense of loyalty?
Since I am not a Vulcan, I won’t sit here and pretend that those things haven’t affected my decision making processes a time or two; I’m human, it happens. Have I stayed in a relationship far past its expiration date because I held out hope that things would get better? Absolutely. Have I stayed in a job that I didn’t like or that didn’t pay enough money because I felt loyal to my employer? Sure. I’ve done those things only to later find that I only grew more miserable with each passing day.
That misery turned into resentment, and things only got worse. I blamed other people for my unhappiness because the sacrifices that I was making didn’t have the reward that I wanted. What I failed to realize was that I had another choice. I could have chosen happiness, but I didn’t. I left the thorn in my finger hoping all the while that the pain would eventually subside.
The pain got worse and worse because infection had set it in. That infection began to spread all over other areas of my life and nothing seemed to make me happy anymore. Before I knew it, I was a miserable human being whose toxins repulsed everyone around me. Who wants to be around someone whose outlook is so bleak that you could see the dark clouds following over his head even on the most beautiful day? Exactly.
What I want you to get out of this is that I had a choice. But once I chose to be unhappy, I gave up any right to complain about it. There’s no one to blame but myself, and until I was ready to accept responsibility for my choices, I’d be left with pain and suffering.
I learned from those experiences, and now I am empowered to make the right choice. Recently, I have been working for a woman who absolutely drives me crazy. She’s always negative. She liked to harp on things, constantly nit-pick every little detail of every little thing, and she was just plain rude. I stuck it out for a while thinking it would get better once I proved to be a valuable asset to the company. Well it didn’t, so I took my own advice. Quitting a job never felt so good! I decided that I was not going to be miserable for another second and I wasn’t going to waste another day of my life working for someone that I could absolutely not stand!
I insist on enjoying my life—without compromise.
I’m not encouraging you to quit your job right now if it puts you or your family in jeopardy, but I will tell you that you can find another job. Same thing goes with your girlfriend, boyfriend, husband, wife or whatever—you have a choice and you can find someone that you are happy being with.
My mother once told me that happiness is my birthright. I have come to discover that, while that is the truth, I have to be the one to decide if I was going to accept it or not. Life goes on either way, but I’d rather chose the way that finds me with this grin on my face and no thorn in my finger! Chose Happiness my friends…
Chris Derrick is a happy writer on his way to fill out some job applications! Giddy up!